Jake

Jake: Mother {he really does address me like that all of the time} did you get me a new swimming suit?

Mom: No, you already have one.

Jake:  I don't like that one it is too long & I want a warm one.

Mike was telling me about an episode of the Supper Nanny, he said that this guy on there was calling his daughters "B's". He didn't use the word, he just said B. Jake was walking through the hallway & over heard Mike. Still on the move, we heard him say to himself, "Hum, I never heard of girls being called B's.... {I shot Mike a look of panic}...then we hear 

"hugh, a bee...buzz, buzzzzz, buzzz"

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Gretchen: It's not fair that Jake got a toy & I didn't!

Jake: You didn't fight mom all day for one, like I did.  

{Mike was not impressed with my mothering skills}

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Jake:  ....cause I'm a hunter.

Mom: I thought you were a cowboy?

Jake: Yeah, well I can't be a cowboy cause you didn't buy me that little pistol from King's.

{Jake is all bent out of shape that King's is going out of business}

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Mom:  Jake, will you please put Gretchen's shoes & socks on her? 

{she had hurt her finger and "can't touch fings"}

Jake: Mom, what do I look like? A genie? Cause I'm not makin' your wishes come true.

Jake: Mom, will you log me onto Webkins?

Mom: No, I'm not a genie & I'm not makin' your wishes come true.

Jake: Mom, that's enough, it's not funny anymore.

Mom:  The thing is, we are a family & if you help me then I will have time to help you.

Jake: Ugh, I just didn't want to put those socks on her grubby little feet.